Tag Archives: whoops apocalypse

The Dark Tower (2017)

“There are other worlds than these.”

Directed by Nikolaj Arcel
Starring Idris Elba, Matthew McConaughey, Tom Taylor, Claudia Kim, Fran Kranz, Abbey Lee, Jackie Earle Haley

Troubled New York teen, Jake Chambers (Taylor), dreams of a strange pyramid, where teenagers from a weird little model suburbia deal are used to power Starkiller Base and attack the colossal Dark Tower. Convinced that his dreams are true, Jake flees from representatives of a sleep clinic and finds his way to an abandoned house with an interdimensional portal in the basement. This catapults him from Keystone Earth to Mid-World, and into the conflict between Jerkass-Good last Gunslinger, Roland Deschain (Elba), and the Affable-Evil immortal devil sorcerer Walter Padick (McConaughey), aka the Man in Black.

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War For the Planet of the Apes (2017)

“For freedom. For family. For the planet.”

Directed by Matt Reeves
Starring Andy Serkis, Woody Harrelson, Steve Zahn, Karin Konoval, Terry Notary and Amiah Miller

Two years after the events of Rise of the Planet of the Apes, a military force led by a ruthless special forces Colonel (Harrelson) are hunting for the tribe of intelligent apes led by Caesar (Serkis). With the aid of their ‘Donkeys’ – apes formerly loyal to Koba (Toby Kebbell) and now working as weapon carriers and scouts for the humans – a unit of this force attacks an Ape outpost, but is defested. Wanting to avoid all-out war, Caesar spares a number of human captives and determines to set out for a new home scouted by his son, Blue-Eyes (Max Lloyd-Jones), and trusted aide Rocket (Notary). Unfortunately, he is betrayed, and his wife Cornelia (Judy Greer) and Blue-Eyes are killed.

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Dead Rising: Watchtower (2015)

dead_rising_watchtower-949038804-large

Directed by Zach Lipocsky
Starring Jesse Metcalfe, Meghan Ory, Virginia Madsen, Dennis Haysbert, Keegan Connor Tracy

Reporter Chase Carter (Metcalfe) and camerawoman Jordan (Tracy) are reporting on the evacuation of East Mission  in the face of a resurgence of a zombie virus despite the use of a drug called Zombrex to control infection. When the Zombrex injections fail, panic breaks out and zombies run amok.

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Blast from the Past: The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension (1984)

adventures-of-buckaroo

“Expect the unexpected. He does.”

Directed by W.D. Richter
Starring Peter Weller, Ellen Barkin, John Lithgow, Jeff Goldblum, Christopher Lloyd and Clancy Brown

During a test of his experimental supersonic jet car, Japanese-American neurosurgeon, particle physicist, martial artist and musician Buckaroo Banzai (Weller) activates the oscillation overthruster, a device which allows him to pass into the solid matter of a mountain, thus entering the 8th Dimension. On hearing of this, Lord John Whorfin, and alien in the body of Dr Emilio Lizardo (Lithgow) breaks out of an asylum to reunite with his lieutenants, the Red Lectroids.

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Independence Day: Resurgence (2016)

independence-day-resurgence

“We had twenty years to prepare. So did they.”
or
“We always knew they’d be back.”
or
“The last attack was just the first.”
Finally, a movie that knows how to tagline!

Directed by Roland Emmerich
Starring Liam Hemsworth, Jeff Goldblum, Jessie T. Usher, Bill Pullman, Maika Monroe, William Fichtner, Sela Ward, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Deobia Oparei, Judd Hirsch, Brent Spiner, Vivica A. Fox, Angelababy and Travis Tope

Twenty years after the 4th July defeat of the alien invasion, Earth is putting the finishing touches to its hybrid-tech defence grid when a new threat appears in a mothership that puts down over the Atlantic like a planetary beret and tries to drill out the planet’s molten core.

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X-Men: Apocalypse (2016)

It's worrying that the publicity machine has bought into Apocalypse's philosophy.
It’s worrying that the publicity machine has bought into Apocalypse’s philosophy.

“Only the Strong Will Survive”

Directed by Bryan Singer
Starring James McAvoy, Jennifer Lawrence, Michael Fassbender, Oscar Issac, Nicholas Hoult, Rose Byrne, Tye Sheridan, Sophie Turner, Olivia Munn, Lucas Till, Evan Peters, Kody Smit-McPhee, Alexandra Shipp and Ben Hardy

In ancient Egypt, the first mutant, En Sabah Nur is betrayed by his people as his consciousness is being transferred to the body of a mutant with healing powers (Isaac). Millennia later, his cult dig up the pyramid and trigger his revival, leading CIA agent Moira McTaggart (Byrne) to accept the suddenly offered aid of mutant expert Charles Xavier (McAvoy).

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Pride & Prejudice & Zombies

Badass.
Badass.

“It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains.”

Directed by Burr Steers
Starring Lily James, Sam Riley and Jack Huston

In a Regency era Britain beset by hordes of the undead, Elizabeth Bennett (James) and her sisters have been trained in the martial arts to repel the zombie horde from their family estate. When the wealthy Mr Bingley (Douglas Booth) buys nearby Netherfield Hall – recently vacated after an outbreak of zombism at a wist party – Mrs Bennett (Sally Phillips) sees a chance to begin marrying her daughters out of what she sees as an undesirable warrior lifestyle. Jane (Bella Heathcoat) soon falls in with Mr Bingley, but Lizzie falls into an altogether more confrontational relationship with Bingley’s friend, professional zombie killer, Colonel Darcy (Riley).

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Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015)

star-wars-force-awakens-official-poster

“Every generation has a story.”

Directed by JJ Abrams
Starring Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Adam Driver, Harrison Ford, Oscar Isaacs, Carrie Fisher, Mark Hamill and… just a fucktonne of good people

Note: This is going to be a spoilerific, wikitastic review. Continue at your own risk.

Thirty years on, a new Republic has risen, but Luke Skywalker has disappeared and the galaxy is threatened by the rise of the First Order, an implacable military-industrial superpower thriving in the absence of the Jedi. Ex-Princess Leia (Fisher) leads a Resistance movement within First Order space (yes, Leia is now a CIA-backed insurgent) while searching for her missing brother.

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Fantastic Four (2015)

Fant-four-stic!
Fant-four-stic!

“Change is Coming”

Directed by Josh Trank
Starring Miles Teller, Jamie Bell, Kate Mara, Michael B Jordan and Toby Kebbell

Child genius Reed Richards (Teller, or he will be when he grows up) builds a teleporter with the help of his friend Ben Grimm (Bell, again, once they grow up.) Dismissed by teachers throughout their lives, Reed is at last recruited by Franklin Storm (Reg E. Cathey) to work on his interdimensional teleporter, along with his adopted daughter Sue (Mara) and tearaway son Johnny (Jordan), and the originator of Storm’s programme, grumpy Latverian Victor von Doom (Kebbell).

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Pacific Rim (2013)

Prepare for spectacle!
Prepare for spectacle!

“Go big or go extinct.”

Directed by Guillermo del Toro
Starring Charlie Hunnam, Rinko Kikuchi and Idris Elba

When huge monsters known as Kaiju emerge from an interdimensional rift in the floor of the Pacific Ocean, humanity unites to create a defence; colossal battle mechs called Jaegers, whose pilots become the new rock stars.

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