Tag Archives: I know kung fu

Ready Player One (2018)

In the novel, the real identities of various characters are kept as a surprise. Cinema doesn’t roll that way.

“A Better Reality Awaits*”

Directed by Steven Spielberg
Starring Tye Sheridan, Olivia Cooke, Ben Mendelsohn, Lena Thwaite, Philip Zhao, Win Morisaki, T.J. Miller, Simon Pegg, Mark Rylance and Hannah John-Kamen

In 2045, with much of the world in the proverbial toilet, vast swathes of the population spend their lives in the OASIS, a vast, persistent virtual reality universe. On his death, the creator of the OASIS, James Halliday (Rylance), set a challenge: The person who discovered three keys and clues leading to an Easter egg in the OASIS would inherit his personal estate and complete control of the system. Some years later, the search for the Egg is contested between freelance ‘Gunters’ like Wade Watts (Sheridan), known in the OASIS as Parzival, and his friend Aech (Thwaite), and the ‘Sixers’, almost literally faceless corporate goons employed by IOI, a company keen to monetise the OASIS, which they already use as an indentured labour camp for debtors.

Continue reading Ready Player One (2018)

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Pacific Rim: Uprising (2018)

“Rise Up”

Directed by Steven S. DeKnight
Starring John Boyega, Scott Eastwood, Jing Tian, Cailee Spaeny, Rinko Kikuchi, Burn Gorman, Adria Arjona, Zhang Jin and Charlie Day

Ten years after the closing of the Breach, the Pan-Pacific Defence Corps continues to guard against the return of the extradimensional Kaiju, while scavengers like Jake ‘Son of Stacker’ Pentecost (Boyega) and Amara Namani (Spaeny) scavenge derelict jaegers for profit or, in the latter case, to build her own mini-jaeger, the totally awesome Scrapper.

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Rebourne: Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle (2017)

“The Game Has Evolved”

Directed by Jake Kasdan
Starring Dwayne Johnson, Karen Gillan, Kevin Hart, Jack Black, Nick Jonas and Bobby Cannavale

The Original

Years after a boy is sucked into a mysterious board game, two more children find the game and begin to play. In order to avoid getting trapped themselves, they must play the game to the end, and in the process learn some important lessons about themselves.

The Late Sequel

In 1996 a teenager finds, but sets aside the Jumanji board game. To lure him in, it becomes a computer game. Twenty years later, four mismatched students – nerdy gamer Spencer (Alex Wolff), jock Fridge (Ser’Darius Blain), queen bee Bethany (Madison Iseman) and angry young woman Martha (Morgan Turner) – are given detention and tasked with clearing out old papers from the basement. There they find the game, and it pulls them in.

Continue reading Rebourne: Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle (2017)

Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)

“Suited vs. Booted”

Directed by Matthew Vaughn
Starring Colin Firth, Julianne Moore, Taron Egerton, Mark Strong, Halle Berry, Elton John, Channing Tatum, Jeff Bridges

Flush with recent successes, the Kingsman private intelligence service comes under fire from treacherous former recruit Charlie (Edward Holcroft) and his boss, Poppy Adams (Moore). Intent on expanding the power of her drugs empire, the Golden Circle, Adams launches a pre-emptive strike on Kingsman, killing all of its agents except for Eggsy (Egerton) and Merlin (Strong), the head of strategic services.

Continue reading Kingsman: The Golden Circle (2017)

The Dark Tower (2017)

“There are other worlds than these.”

Directed by Nikolaj Arcel
Starring Idris Elba, Matthew McConaughey, Tom Taylor, Claudia Kim, Fran Kranz, Abbey Lee, Jackie Earle Haley

Troubled New York teen, Jake Chambers (Taylor), dreams of a strange pyramid, where teenagers from a weird little model suburbia deal are used to power Starkiller Base and attack the colossal Dark Tower. Convinced that his dreams are true, Jake flees from representatives of a sleep clinic and finds his way to an abandoned house with an interdimensional portal in the basement. This catapults him from Keystone Earth to Mid-World, and into the conflict between Jerkass-Good last Gunslinger, Roland Deschain (Elba), and the Affable-Evil immortal devil sorcerer Walter Padick (McConaughey), aka the Man in Black.

Continue reading The Dark Tower (2017)

Wonder Woman (2017)

“Power. Grace. Wisdom. Wonder.”

Directed by Patty Jenkins
Starring Gal Gadot, Chris Pine, Robin Wright, Danny Huston, David Thewlis, Connie Nielsen, Elena Anaya and Lucy Davis

On the isolated, paradisaical island of Themyscira, Diana, daughter of Queen Hippolyta of the Amazons (Nielsen) is the only child on an island of women. Trained in combat by her aunt Antiope (Wright), Diana (who grows up into Gadot) is fascinated by the origin story of her people and their prophesied battle to destroy Ares, last of the Olympians and bringer of all wars.

“Yes, because she’s suddenly not the most beautiful woman you’ve ever met.”

Continue reading Wonder Woman (2017)

Rebourne: Ghost in the Shell (2017)

Directed by Rupert Sanders
Starring Scarlett Johansson, Michael Pitt, Pilou Asbæk, Chin Han, Juliette Binoche and ‘Beat’ Takeshi Kitano

The Original

“That’s what I do. I jump off things and disappear.”

Major Motoko Kusanagi, a human brain in a robot body (the ‘shell’ which holds her psyche/soul/’ghost’) pursues cyberpunk criminals in a cyberpunk world. I’ll be honest, this is about all I know except a) she has an active camouflage system in her robot skin and b) jumps off high roofs while looking into the camera. I will try to watch the anime (the actual original is a manga comic, originally titled ‘Mobile Armoured Riot Police’,) and maybe even Stand Alone Complex and the new movie (imaginatively entitled ‘The New Movie’.)

The Remake

Right…

What we’re looking at here is of course the US remake starring Scarlett Johansson as Major Mira Killian, a woman whose refugee boat was blown up by terrorists, leaving her brain to be implanted in a robot body by not-even-slightly-dodgy corporate giants Hanka Robotics so that she can fight crime.

Continue reading Rebourne: Ghost in the Shell (2017)

John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017)

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“Never Stab the Devil in the Back”

Directed by Chad Stahelski
Starring Keanu Reeves, Common, Laurence Fishburne, Riccardo Scamarcio, Ruby Rose, John Leguizamo, Ian McShane

After the brutal events of John Wick, our titular antihero (Reeves) slaughters a taxi garage full of mob enforcers to retrieve his car, shares a drink with the brother (Peter Stormare) of our previous antagonist and heads home to bury his past once again. Unfortunately, now that he has resurfaced he is not to be allowed to go back out.

Continue reading John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017)

The Great Wall (2017)

And yet he got in...
And yet he got in…

“1700 years to build. 5500 miles long. What were they trying to keep out?”

Directed by Zhang Yimou
Starring Matt Damon, Jing Tian, Pedro Pascal, Willem Dafoe, Andy Lau

In the 11th century, a band of mercenaries including the English (Irish? I’m not sure what he’s going for) William (Damon) and the Spanish (they keep referring to Spain, despite being some centuries before the formation of said Kingdom) Tovar (Pascal), is whittled down by bandits and finally all but the last two are killed by a beast which William kills, cutting off its clawed and scaled arm. Fleeing bandit reinforcements, the pair are suddenly faced with the Great Wall and its defenders, the Nameless Order, who ponder the possibility of killing them until they learn that he slew a ‘Tao Tei’ single handed.

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The Lego Batman Movie (2017)

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Nananananananana

“Always be yourself… unless you can be Batman.”

Directed by Chris McKay
Starring Will Arnett, Zach Galifianakis, Michael Cera, Rosario Dawson, Ralph Fiennes

In crime-ridden Gotham City, the Joker (Galifianakis) launches a devastating attack in concert with a vast assortment of other villains, only to be soundly (and rhythmically) defeated by Batman (Arnett). When Batman declines to acknowledge his greatest foe (because he doesn’t do ‘ships,) however, Joker concocts a plan of breathtaking audacity to take his nemesis down a peg or two.

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